Sunday, December 28, 2008

My present

This is my new bike--courtesy of Sparky for Christmas!! I have been wanting one for ages & found this one online at Wal-Mart after seeing it featured on a Today show segment. Well, I was looking at a recliner when Sparky was shopping for a chair (we redecorated his living room) & he told me "I will get it for you if you want since you haven't told me what you want Santie to bring you" Well, I took that opportunity to mention the beach cruiser. So.....That's what I got. I hadn't ridden a bike in at least 40 years but I just hopped on & took off (Sparky found the bike at our local store so no need to ship it--YEAH!!). I am so stoked to have it. Right now it is sitting in my spare bedroom & I ride whenever the weather permits. I am still building up my stamina (I was in worse shape than I thought), but I am planning on riding everyday come Spring, Summer, Fall. This will be a big boon to my weight loss program (10-12 lbs already). Also, I will be able to take one of the furbabies with me on leash to trot along beside--I watch a lot of the Dog Whisperer LOL. Anyway, that is my Christmas present. Happy peddling to me!!

Blessed be...

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas to All

Merry Christmas!!! I hope everything you wished for was under your tree, that your guests have arrived safely, & that you have a joyous day celebrating the birth of Jesus.
I will be off in a couple of hours to enjoy Christmas dinner with Sparky & his Mom at her house. She loves to cook for us! I was planning to stay home & read, listen to some music, watch a movie. When I told Sparky he said "But aren't you coming to my Mother's? You know she is cooking for us" Well, I knew she was cooking for him. Seems she expects me too. I was so touched. She has been such a blessing in my life. She just stepped right in when my Mom was being so hateful to me. Now, she just considers me family, too (I have known her my whole life). So, since my Mom & stepdad aren't celebrating Christmas I will be with my MIL & Sparky.
Blessed be...

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Christmas Eve

I hope tonight is magical for each of you, for your children, & your entire family!! May the joy of the Season fill your hearts tonight as we celebrate the joyous reason for the Season. My Christmas wish for each of you is:

  • unconditional love
  • true friendship
  • boundless joy
  • good health
  • happiness
  • prosperity of Spirit
  • knowledge of Great Spirit
  • the knowledge that you are one of a kind, here on this Adventure for a great purpose, & valued beyond measure

Merry Christmas !!!!!!!!!!!!

Blessed be....

Tuesday, December 23, 2008


Aquarius Tues, 12/23/08
1/20 – 2/18

If you have deep feelings for someone who has wronged you, making a fresh start can be challenging. Moving completely past grudges and anger is often impossible to do. So if you are feeling like you want to stop trying to put the past behind you, then take a break from being the bigger person. Get your distance from the people who don't make you feel good about yourself. Let time show you whether you should keep someone in your life, or let them know that it is time to move on.
Yesterday I received a package from Big Guy in Seattle. It was a lovely photograph of a wolf pack as well as a beautiful collector plate with an Indian maiden & a wolf. They are both just beautiful & I was very surprised to get them since we have not spoken in quite a while ( I called a timeout to our phone conversations a few months ago). Our friendship has run its course, he said some very hurtful things to me (one was about my brother) & I called it quits on the phone conversations--told him I needed a break, explained how he was making me feel about myself & how hurtful his approach to me & others was to me, how uncomfortable it made me (we have known each other since we were 14 & were engaged for about a year a few years ago & have kept in touch). There was no card, nothing just the two items. So I have written a quick thank you letter & also explained that it is time for our friendship to be over. I explained it has just become too unsettling to me each time we speak. He is one of those men who thinks if I express a complaint about something he has to tell me how to fix it. Not what I need (The Sparkman just lets me rant, then tell him my plan & he either agrees or not, but he has never told me what to do--I think he knows better LOL). Anyway, this horoscope today was just what I needed & I believe it speaks of the relationship that must now end. Sad, but I think necessary for my mental, emotional, & spiritual wellbeing. Big Guy & I are just not on the same page & the friendship is becoming toxic. So, I made a grownup decision--sever the ties. After 42 yrs I am free of the fantasy of a life with him. My how I have grown.
Blessed be...

Monday, December 22, 2008

Cards to our Troops

Something cool that Xerox is doing

If you go to this web site, you can pick out a thank you card and Xerox will print it and it will be sent to a soldier that is currently serving in Iraq .

You can't pick out who gets it, but it will go to a member of the armed services. How AMAZING it would be if we could get everyone we know to send one!!! This is a great site. Please send a card. It is FREE and it only takes a second.

Blessed be...

Friday, December 19, 2008


Wolf Energy

In Native American traditions, Wolf is said to be "teacher" medicine. Humans have followed Wolf for millennia, studying Wolf's ways of the hunt, learning from their social structure. Wolf is allied with Sirus, the Dog Star, and it is said in many cultures, that our ancestors and teachers came from there. This is agreed upon by Australian Aborigines, and the Dogon tribe of Africa, as well as certain Native American tribes.

Wolf has much to teach us, if only we will listen. Wolf is allied to the moon and lunar energies, teaching us to respect our emotions and unconscious urges. Respect for the wildness of our animal natures, and willingness to face the dark within ourselves is an imperative for Wolf people. Trust in the unspoiled nature of your Child/Wolf self. Because the Moon rules psychic perception, Wolf people should work on learning to trust their intuition and psychic urges, to listen for the still small voice within.

The communal nature of Wolf's culture and hunting helps us to learn to cooperate to achieve a goal. Wolf people make good "team players" and are fiercely loyal to those they consider part of their pack. They often have strong leadership qualities, however they must often learn to balance their tendency for "social dominancing." As a predator, Wolf culls the sick and weak of the herd. Wolves are often quick to scent when a situation is "sick," and will work to change it. It is important that they learn to lead the situation gently, and without tearing others apart, or the pack may turn on them.

Wolf's capacity for communication suggests that Wolf people should learn to utilize the strength of their voice and to be aware of their body language. When dealing with Wolf people, listening for the nuances of vocal tone and watching their motions will help in gaining an understanding of them. Wolves often make excellent bards and storytellers.

Ritual is very important to Wolf. Both the little rituals of day-to-day conduct, and the bigger rituals of lunar howling. Whatever their spiritual beliefs, Wolf people will feel more in tune when they honor and re-link (the actual meaning of the word "religion") with the life force.


Wolves are the epitome of stamina, known to run 35 miles a day in pursuit of prey. They are highly misunderstood animals, who have gained the reputation of being cold blooded. In reality wolves are friendly and social creatures. Aggression is something they avoid, preferring rather to growl or create a posture to show dominance.

Even though living in close knit packs provide wolves with a strong sense of family, they are still able to maintain their individuality. Wolves represent the spirit of freedom, but they realize that having individual freedom requires having responsibilities.

Because wolf is a teacher and pathfinder, he comes when we need guidance in our lives. Those who have a Wolf Totem will move on to teach others about sacredness and spirituality. Wolf can also teach how to balance the responsibility of family needs and not to lose one's personal identity.

Wolf teaches us to develop strength and confidence in our decisions. He shows we will learn to trust our insights once we learn how to value our inner voice. This wisdom keeps us from inappropriate action. If wolf appears in your life examine where you need to develop more confidence and if you need more balance between friends, family, and yourself.


As I have mentioned previously, my totem is the Wolf. Wolf has come to me often over the years starting when I was somewhere around 8-9-10yrs old. No older than 10 because the last documented wolf in OK was killed in 1962. My grandparents had a dairy farm where I spent much of my younger years. It was not uncommon to see the bodies of coyotes & wolfs hanging on fence posts on the road to their farm. Hung there by the bounty hunters. It was a horrendous sight that I grew up seeing. I never became immune to the awful sight, the horror of it all. One day I got dropped off at the farm & was quickly admonished by my Nanny to stay away from the culvert (under the drive into the home place) because the hunters had corned a wolf under there & were coming back for it. Now when you tell me, or most any kid for that matter, not to do something because there is something really interesting there....well suffice to say I did not stay away. The ends of the culvert had been "fenced off" with wire mesh so I just laid on the ground in front of one end & stared in. There was the wolf, gleaming eyes, never growled, just moved a little forward & laid flat out on its belly. We just looked at each other for a very long time. It was a silent communication just between our two souls. That is the day that the Wolf Spirit entered/joined with my Spirit. I vaguely remember the wolfers coming & taking that beautiful animal. I know I was there when it happened because I remember it being caged & looking so resigned to its fate. I know that wolf did not die that day for he lives in me where his Spirit, joined all those years ago with mine, is safe & alive. He has guided me over the years--even the times when I forgot to listen. He comes to me in dreams, in visions, in fleeting sightings. I have seen him standing in my driveway as if watching over me & mine. I see him glide through my house, just checking in, just passing by. A pack comes to my dreams when I have big decisions to make or a situation is particularly stressful for me. They guide me home, figuratively & sometimes quite literally.

I carry my totem with me always--in my heart, my soul, a tatto on my thigh. I wear wolf jewelry quite often. I always have a statue, a picture or a painting in my house. Often one in every room. I visit wolf sanctuaries & sit & commune with the souls there. One of my favorites is Wolf Haven International in Tenino, WA ( where I have camped & howled with the wolves into the night--it was such an awesome experience. I have been going there since it opened (1982) & have seen the graves of wolves I communed with in the early years. If you live in WA or OR it is worth the drive to Tenino-they do awesome, informative, educational tours, & the wolves are fantastic. When you see the ravens, remember there were no ravens there until the wolves came, they are symbiotic. I have held wolf cubs in my arms, felt their hearts beating next to mine, smelled their scent & carry it with me always, stroked their fur & feel it under my fingers everyday.

I have given wolf totems to each of my tribe members to wear or carry with them. I have assembled my pack over the years & continue to do so. Not everyone I meet becomes a tribe/pack member. Some it takes awhile, for some it is an immediate acceptance, some never become a member & move on. No matter the distance between us we are joined. We honor the same full moon, we hear each other's howls & recognize the need that is spoken. We laugh & play, grieve & cry, hunt & celebrate when we gather together once more. We are solitary, we are a pack/a tribe---we are Family!!!

Blessed be...

Monday, December 15, 2008

This is cool

Thanks to Pampered Wife for this link. Just go there, put in the day & month of your birth & you get your birth Bible verse.

Genesis 1:26 NIV

"Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground."

I think this one is kinda "funny" for me. I know God made me in his image but I sure don't want to rule over anyone or anything. "Specially my furbabies. LOL! But I do have a love of & an affinity for Nature & all the beings that inhabit this planet. I LOVE animals. Maybe that's what it means. Honor & take care of the winged, feathered, & the four-legged. Hum, I will have to meditate on this.

Blessed be...

Friday, December 12, 2008


Following The Sun

by Enigma

Following The Sun .....

Following the sun, to find the one

Who's given you the wings to fly

Following the sun, the golden one

Losing sense for space and time
I'm following the sun

To find the one who

Can feel the waves of life

Can you hear the sigh of love

Do you believe in it?
Following the sun, just for the one

Till you find the door you thought

Following the sun, like everyone

Just searching for a sign of hope
I'm following the sun

To find the one and look up in the sky, see the billion stars above.

Cause maybe on one of them you'll spendyour further life.
Following the sun...


How often in my life have I followed the sun, chasing the sun, always chasing, always searching. Then one day I stopped & realized so profoundly that what I was chasing I had always possessed, always held inside of my heart, deep within my soul. The SON!!! With that the SUN began to shine so brightly, even on the darkest days. The ephiphany was so great. It was truly the audible voice of Great Spirit. And, I stopped & I listened.

That day began my journey toward healing. My journey to my true/authentic self. That was the day I stopped the destructive lifestyle that I had been living for so long. Stopped & faced my demons. Got honest with myself. Hit my knees & prayed. My life did a 180. Now, looking back, it is so hard to recognize that girl who defined me for so many years. Oh, I have kept alot of her, but most of her is gone replaced by a kinder, gentler, more enlightened version. It used to be so very hard to live in my skin, to be alone with myself. Now I embrace, & so totally enjoy, my time alone. Time to reflect, meditate, hang out just with me. I have become my own friend. WOW!!

Just the other day I was talking to Sparky about my past (which I don't do too often unless something comes up to which it is relavent) & I said" My friends from back in the day would not recognize me now. Oh, they would physically recognize me (my face has not changed since birth LOL-everyone recognized me even years later) but they would not know me any longer." Most would be shocked, many are probably dead by now (that's the path I was headed), some may be in jail (yep, I have had a colorful life filled with colorful people), but they would not know or want to know the woman I am today. I have grown, I have matured, I have mellowed, I have changed. All for the better.

When people talk to me about being afraid to die, I tell them I am not. There are several reasons for this: (1) I know where I am headed, (2) I believe that my life continues on the Other Side, (3) I have been to hell & spit in the devil's eye. He had me once, he fought hard to keep me, & he fights still to get me back. But my demons stop by less often. They have moved on to easier prey. Now I know how to fight them, I know how to banish them, & when I am weak I have the best warrior of all to send His angels to surround me & fight for me. They always win!! While others have often given up on me, Great Spirit never did & for this I am & will be eternally grateful. It is a blessing to know that unconditional love. Someday I will be able to thank Him face to face.

Now, when I chase the sun I am simply looking for a warm beach, with blue waters & a comfy chair in which to sit & read while I listen to the water lapping the shore.

Blessed be...

Tuesday, December 9, 2008


You can access it from "My Blog List" sidebar.

Blessed be...


"There is no such thing in anyone's life as an unimportant day."
Alexander Woollcott


In thinking about this I thought how many times I had lived a day that I thought just wasn't too important in the whole scheme of things. Just an average day. Maybe I went to work or the store. Maybe I strolled the mall. Just an unimportant day. Then I thought deeper. I began to realize that every day no matter where I am or what I am doing, I touch someone else's life. Whether it is a client at work either on the phone or in person, a clerk, the maintenance man, the counter person at the deli, just someone I pass on my stroll. In some way by either my look, words, manner, demeanor, smile, or lack of one I touch that person's life & have the ability to perhaps make it a better day for them. We never know what another person is going through on any given day at any given time, but we are all at one time or another experiencing trauma, grief, disappointment, hardship, heartache, or just an all around crappy day. Just a smile or a kind hello can make all the difference. A pat on the shoulder, a friendly glance. It can all change the day for someone who is going through something of which we are not aware. No longer will I think the day is unimportant. Any day, in any way we can be of service to others. Sometimes we never even know it.

Blessed be...

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Who Are You???

I am_______________

A Baby Boomer, Mom, daughter, grandmother, friend, ex-hippie, former Wild Child (I proudly express this on my front license plate), a survivor, a confident woman, loyal, proud, humorous, friendly, sometimes frustrating especially to my boyfriend, sometime enchanting.

I live_______________

In Southcentral OK just off I-35 in a small house with a nice yard

I work______________

For an insurance agent. New field for me, but ever the assistant, ever efficient and hardworking

My favorite___________

Food: Mexican or Thai
Place: Key West, the Oregon/Washington coast, mountains of Montana

My inspiration___________

My brother


60's Rock, Southern Rock, Classic Country, Old-time Gospel, Folk--no Opera, no Hip Hop, no Rap, but I listen to most anything else


Novels, biographies, true crime. Anything of a spiritual nature, I read the Bible, all Eastern religions, I have read the Koran, The Book of Morman, anything on Native American Spirituality.


One son, one daughter-in-law, one grandson, two granddaughters, Mother, Step-Father (who adores me BTW). Most importantly--My Tribe!! those who are my family of choice even though we share no blood.

My darlin' "boys"--the FURKIDS: Lobo "Little Lobo/Lobee", Scrappy "ScrapMan/Scrapster/Scrapmeister", & Zane "Zaner/ZaneyDog/LittleMan". They are a joy in my life-the unconditional love makes me want to be the person they think I am. Lobo is a miniature schnauzer as is Scrappy. Lobo is an AKC Miniature Schnauzer that my Mom bought for me 4 yrs ago. He was bred by a friend of mine who is a policeofficer who was on the force with my bro. He is such a duffous. Very funny, the perpetual puppy. I think he has the Peter Pan complex. Scrappy was on death row in OKC, rescued by Pet Angels, & found by me on He is so laid back & affectionate-the moment I met him I knew he was my forever pupster. Scrappy saved me & Lobo from a pitbull attack. That little dog just put himself between us & went after that big dog. It was amazing his fierceness to protect me. Luckily, he got away with only one minor puncture wound on his head. Zane is also a rescue from Fido Knows found on He is a Pembroke Welsh Corgi/Miniature Schnauzer mix. He is tri-colored with little short legs, but he thinks he is a Rottweiler. Too cute!! I just fell in love with his pic & knew he was my forever pupster. He rounded out our little family.


Animal rights, Women's rights, Environmental rights, Human rights, Endangered species, Adoption of shelter animals, down with puppy mills

I blog__________________

because it is a great way to stay in touch with my Tribe, I meet wonderfully interesting new people all over the place. It is a creative outlet, it is my online journal (I print it off each year & save it with my handwritten journal).


To win the lottery & use my funds for good causes, live in the mountains, live at the beach, travel cross country again, open an animal rescue sanctuary, work with battered women, have a holistic center for retreats.


Yes, 4 to be exact. A howling wolf (my totem animal, more about that in a future post), a yellow rose (I got this one after I had been clean & sober for 3 mos- I now have almost 14 yrs), the Stars & Bars (to signify my Southern Heritage-it is NOT a racial statement but simply a pride in my ancestery), a cherub & if you look close enough you will see very small horns in the head(signifies that I know my angels are always looking over me, sitting on my shoulder, but that my evil twin could surface at any moment-just when I think I have killed her she can resurface, but the incidents are getting fewer & further between).


Well, that's me. Who are you???? (song by The Who)

Blessed be...

Wednesday, December 3, 2008


Thanks to my good friend, Amy for sharing this with me this morning.

This is really deep. Enjoy and keep it going.

If you ever look at yourself and feel that you don't measure up, read this and your outlook will change before you finish reading it!

This is good to keep, not just to read from time to time, but to also keep stored in your heart! Enjoy and remember who you are....

A Letter from God to Women

When I created the heavens and the earth, I spoke them into being. When I created man, I formed him and breathed life into his nostrils. But you, woman,

I fashioned after I breathed the breath of life into man because your nostrils are too delicate. I allowed a deep sleep to come over him so I could patiently and perfectly fashion you. Man was put to sleep so that he could not
interfere with the creativity. From one bone, I fashioned you. I chose the bone that protects man's life. I chose the rib, which protects his heart and lungs and supports him, as you are meant to do.

Around this one bone, I shaped you.... I modeled you. I created you perfectly and beautifully. Your characteristics are as the rib, strong yet delicate and fragile. You provide protection for the most delicate organ in man, his
heart. His heart is the center of his being; his lungs hold the breath of life. The rib cage will allow itself to be broken before it will allow damage to the heart. Support man as the rib cage supports the body.

You were not taken from his feet, to be under him, nor were you taken from his head, to be above him.

You were taken from his side, to stand beside him and be held close to his side.

You are my perfect angel.....You are my beautiful little girl. You have grown to be a splendid woman of excellence and my eyes fill when I see the virtues
in your heart.

Your eyes......don' t change them.

Your lips - how lovely when they part in prayer.

Your nose, so perfect in form.

Your hands so gentle to touch.

I've caressed your face in your deepest sleep.

I've held your heart close to mine.

Of all that lives and breathes, you are most like me.

Adam walked with me in the cool of the day, yet he was lonely. He could not see me or touch me. He could only feel me. So everything I wanted Adam to share
and experience with me, I fashioned in you; my holiness, my strength, my purity, my love, my protection and support.

You are special because you are an extension of me. Man represents my image, woman my emotions. Together, you represent the totality of God.

So man......treat women well. Love her, respect her, for she is fragile but yet strong at the same time.

Author Unknown
Blessed be...

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Thanksgiving Meme

Thanks to the Pampered Wife for this one

A) Home or somewhere else?
Sparky's Mom's house (I affectionately call her my mother-in-law because she has always been so wonderful, loving, accepting, & kind to me)

B) Anything out of the ordinary this Thanksgiving?
No desserts since Sparkman & I are on diets

C) Will there be a football game on at your place?
We watched "Miracle on 34th St", but I did have to switch to check the score for the Cowboys--go Dallas!!!

D) Apple, pumpkin, or mince pie for you?
pumpkin pie

E) Everyone at one table or is there a ‘B” table?
There were only 3 of us so we all got to sit together LOL

F) Will someone say grace?
Usually MIL does but this year we did not say grace. I missed it

G) Who does the cooking?
MIL, but I do cleanup & putting away leftovers

H) What wish will you do on this virtual wishbone?
Love, happiness, prosperity, peace, & blessings for my tribe.


Beautiful Sunday everyone!!

Blessed be...

Thursday, November 27, 2008


Today...& every day I am thankful for:

  • My tribe (the friends & family of my heart/soul)
  • My health
  • My faith
  • My ability to survive
  • My love of humanity
  • My love of Nature
  • Great Spirit's love for me
  • The blessings that come upon me unaware
  • The time I was given to say goodbye, I love you, & all else to my brother before he left this world for the next
  • Having loved & been loved
  • Loving myself
  • Learning to accept myself just as I am at this very moment
  • Learning to trust my instincts
  • Learning to say "no" & not feeling guilty
  • Learning to ask for what I need even when I don't get it
  • Accepting others just as they are at this very moment
  • A home that is safe, comfortable,warm & dry
  • The ability to put food on my own table
  • Generosity
  • Beauty
  • Graciousness
  • Honesty
  • Honor

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!

Blessed be...

Wednesday, November 26, 2008


Thanks for The Pampered Wife Goes Thrifty for the meme. Feel free to play if you wish.


1. Who is the most famous person you’ve talked to?
Rock Hudson--he was filming a movie in Vegas when I lived there & ate in the bar I was managing.

2. How many bags of potato chips (crisps) are consumed at your house per month?
I don't eat them since I am on my diet

3. What foreign dish do you prepare from scratch and serve?
Stirfried noodles &/or rice w/veggies--lots of middle eastern spices.

4. What is your favourite section of the supermarket?
I love the produce section

5. What was your high school’s team mascot and colors?

6. What’s under your bed?
A vintage formica kitchen table

7. Over easy, or sunny side up?
Omelet--when I eat them

8. Favorite pie?
Blueberry cream

9. Storms - cool or scary?
Love storms--very cool especially in OK springtime

10. Name the brand of the shoes you’re currently we

11. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
From my friend/almost sister-in-law Cheryl asking me to call. She used to be engaged to my bro & was really feeling down.

12. Where did you live in 1987?
Las Vegas, NV

13. Where were you when 9/11 happened?
Work in OK

14. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?
Spanish-I took it for two years, but would really like to be more proficient

15. Can you change the oil on a car?
16. Your first love: what is the last thing you heard about him/her?
He lives in WA & teaches NRA classes, living off his inheritance.

17. Gummy bears or worms?

18. Your favorite food?
Mexican or Thai


Blessed be...

Friday, November 21, 2008

Fill in the blanks

1. The last band I saw live was _________. The Who//OKC Ford Ctr

2. What I look forward to most on Thanksgiving is _________. (if you don't celebrate thanksgiving, insert your favorite holiday). Dressing (or stuffing as some call it, but in OK it is Dressing & my favorite part of the meal. I eat it with cranberry sauce).

3. My Christmas/holiday shopping is __________. Something I don't do. We gave up presents, etc years ago.

4. Thoughts of _____________ fill my head. Key West. I am missing the beach. It is colder than h..l in OK today. Brrrr

5. I wish I could wear ______________. Mini skirts. I miss them because I do have great legs, but short skirts are a thing of the past for me.

6. Bagpipes ________. Remind me of my brother's funeral. They were the only live music. A good friend played & piped my bro to his grave as his casket was carried between rows of his fellow police officers. It was awesome.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to _____, tomorrow my plans include _____ and Sunday, I want to _____! Putting on my sweats & watching TV with my furkids. Sat will be sleeping in & taking it easy. Sunday means laundry & reading the papers.


Have a wonderful weekend everyone!!

Blessed be....

Monday, November 17, 2008


These Are My Wishes For You

Sandra Sturtz Hauss

May you find serenity and tranquility in a world you may not always understand.

May the pain you have known and the conflict you have experienced give you the strength to walk through life facing each new situation with courage and optimism.

Always know that there are those whose love and understanding will always be there, even when you feel most alone.

May a kind word, a reassuring touch, and a warm smile be yours every day of your life, and may you give these gifts as well as receive them.

May the teachings of those you admire become part of you, so that you may call upon them. Remember, those whose lives you have touched and who have touched yours are always a part of you, even if the encounters were less than you would have wished.

It is the content of the encounter that is more important than its form.

May you not become too concerned with material matters, but instead place immeasurable value on the goodness in your heart.

Find time in each day to see beauty and love in the world around you.

Realize that what you feel you lack in one regard you may be more than compensated for in another.

What you feel you lack in the present may become one of your strengths in the future.

May you see your future as one filled with promise and possibility.

Learn to view everything as a worthwhile experience.

May you find enough inner strength to determine your own worth by yourself, and not be dependent on another's judgment of your accomplishments.

May you always feel loved.


Blessed be...

Saturday, November 15, 2008

It's been 4 years

It has been four years today since my darlin' brother lost his battle with cancer. He fought a good fight, never felt sorry for himself, & always lifted up those around him. He would not want us to grieve. He would want us to live fully, & I have been trying so hard to do just that. To live the life he could not finish. He was 47 yrs old, just 2 1/2 months short of his 48th birthday when he crossed from this life to the Other Side. His faith was unwavering & he left this life with smile of joy on his lips. So, I have lifted a glass of wine in his honor. I have toasted his life, I have thanked him for not only teaching me how to live, but also how to die.
He loved the beach, the sun. He loved to ride (he was a biker at heart) & the wind in his face was his therapy. Today, as it did on the day he left & as it has continued to do each November 15th since, the weather turned. It is cold & the wind is blowing strongly. Each anniversary of my brother's death brings winter to whatever part of OK I am in. Today, I was in Dallas all day (Sparky planned the trip & took me everywhere I wanted to go shopping. He knows the day & he honored it as, I think, Dave asked him to...taking care of me) & winter arrived there too. I know you left in the sunshine that broke through that morning, but it brought winter to my heart & to OK that day. I love you, I miss you & I will with each breath I take. You are my hero!!
Cheers, bro!! til we meet again in our Father's House.
Blessed be...

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Every Woman...


A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to…
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... .something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour…
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...a youth she’s content to leave behind….
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...a past juicy enough that she’s looking forward to retelling it in her old age….
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ….a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra…
A WOMAN SHOULD friend who always makes her laugh… and one who lets her cry…
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family…
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her guests feel honored…
A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE... .a feeling of control over her destiny.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…how to fall in love without losing herself.
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…how to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without; ruining the friendship…
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…that she can’t change the length of her calves,the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents..
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…that her childhood may not have been perfect…but its over…
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…what she would and wouldn’t do for love or more…
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…how to live alone… even if she doesn’t like it…
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW..whom she can trust,whom she can’t,and why she shouldn’t take it personally…
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…where to go…be it to her best friend’s kitchen table…or a charming inn in the woods…when her soul needs soothing…
EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…what she can and can’t accomplish in a day…a month…and a year…
-Pamela Redmond Satran
Blessed be...

Friday, November 7, 2008

Lost Puppy

"I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I'm out of control and at times I'm hard to deal with..but, if you can't handle me at my worst, then you don't deserve me at my best."- Marilyn Monroe


Well said, Marilyn!! The same could be said about me. In fact, I am saying this about myself. But that is not really what's on my mind today. Today I am, as I have been since the weekend, thinking about my weight. I have had weight issues all my life. Thought I was fat when I wasn't, had anorexia twice, ballooned overnight & found out my thyroid is less than functioning. I lost alot of weight after that & maintained many years. Came to grips that I would never be rail-thin again. Didn't own a set of scales for 10 yrs. Well, clothes aren't looking quite right on me, my doc prescribed the wrong thyroid hormone dosage, got that corrected, felt better, began to hate my body, bought a scale. OMG!!!! I am 50 lbs heavier than I thought &, quite frankly, after some research I really need to lose about 100 lbs. OMG!!! I am so depressed!! So, what did I do this week?? Ate all the crap in my kitchen (sweets, etc) to get rid of them because I hate throwing away food. Now I have to get my butt (my big-assed butt) in gear, begin again with yoga, pilates, walking, running, anything to get this blankidee blank weight off. I am so sick of being this size. I used to be one of those women who walked into a room & guys stared. I was a presence. Now I am just old & fat!! I don't mind being older-I relish the white hair (I earned it), I embrace the wisdom that I have now (boy, did I lack wisdom at 20, 30, early 40's). But I just hate the weight. I have to get motivated.

I think the motivation thing is hard right now because while I am not unhappy, I am not happy either. I don't dislike my job, I just don't particularly like it. Life just is right now. I exist. While my Mom & I are speaking again I don't really care if we communicate or not. While I see Sparky every weekend I don't care if we spend time together or not. I just seem to have hit a blah stage. Nothing excites me. My only joy is spending time with my furkids. They make me laugh & give so much love. I have love in my life--my sister-in-love, Butterflies, my son & grands. I can honestly say I don't want a man in my life full time because I don't want to put up with what it takes to make a relationship work. I have never been in a really good relationship so maybe I just don't know what I am missing.

But right now I have to lose this WEIGHT!! HELP!!!

Blessed be...

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

The Times They Are A Changing...

Our New President, Barack Obama

May God Bless him, give him courage, & guide his every decision


John McCain, a class act to the end as evidenced by his speech last night in conceding his defeat for the office of President of the United States of America.


MCCAIN: Thank you. Thank you, my friends. Thank you for coming here on this beautiful Arizona evening.My friends, we have — we have come to the end of a long journey. The American people have spoken, and they have spoken clearly. A little while ago, I had the honor of calling Sen. Barack Obama to congratulate him.


Please. To congratulate him on being elected the next president of the country that we both love. In a contest as long and difficult as this campaign has been, his success alone commands my respect for his ability and perseverance. But that he managed to do so by inspiring the hopes of so many millions of Americans who had once wrongly believed that they had little at stake or little influence in the election of an American president is something I deeply admire and commend him for achieving. This is an historic election, and I recognize the special significance it has for African-Americans and for the special pride that must be theirs tonight. I've always believed that America offers opportunities to all who have the industry and will to seize it. Sen. Obama believes that, too.

But we both recognize that, though we have come a long way from the old injustices that once stained our nation's reputation and denied some Americans the full blessings of American citizenship, the memory of them still had the power to wound.

A century ago, President Theodore Roosevelt's invitation of Booker T. Washington to dine at the White House was taken as an outrage in many quarters. America today is a world away from the cruel and frightful bigotry of that time. There is no better evidence of this than the election of an African-American to the presidency of the United States.

Let there be no reason now ... Let there be no reason now for any American to fail to cherish their citizenship in this, the greatest nation on Earth. Sen. Obama has achieved a great thing for himself and for his country. I applaud him for it, and offer him my sincere sympathy that his beloved grandmother did not live to see this day. Though our faith assures us she is at rest in the presence of her Creator and so very proud of the good man she helped raise.

Obama and I have had and argued our differences, and he has prevailed. No doubt many of those differences remain. These are difficult times for our country. And I pledge to him tonight to do all in my power to help him lead us through the many challenges we face.

I urge all Americans ... I urge all Americans who supported me to join me in not just congratulating him, but offering our next president our goodwill and earnest effort to find ways to come together to find the necessary compromises to bridge our differences and help restore our prosperity, defend our security in a dangerous world, and leave our children and grandchildren a stronger, better country than we inherited. Whatever our differences, we are fellow Americans.

And please believe me when I say no association has ever meant more to me than that. It is natural. It's natural, tonight, to feel some disappointment. But tomorrow, we must move beyond it and work together to get our country moving again. We fought — we fought as hard as we could. And though we feel short, the failure is mine, not yours.


MCCAIN: I am so...


MCCAIN: I am so deeply grateful to all of you for the great honor of your support and for all you have done for me. I wish the outcome had been different, my friends.


MCCAIN: The road was a difficult one from the outset, but your support and friendship never wavered. I cannot adequately express how deeply indebted I am to you. I'm especially grateful to my wife, Cindy, my children, my dear mother ... my dear mother and all my family, and to the many old and dear friends who have stood by my side through the many ups and downs of this long campaign. I have always been a fortunate man, and never more so for the love and encouragement you have given me. You know, campaigns are often harder on a candidate's family than on the candidate, and that's been true in this campaign. All I can offer in compensation is my love and gratitude and the promise of more peaceful years ahead.

I am also — I am also, of course, very thankful to Gov. Sarah Palin, one of the best campaigners I've ever seen ... one of the best campaigners I have ever seen, and an impressive new voice in our party for reform and the principles that have always been our greatest strength ... her husband, Todd, and their five beautiful children ... for their tireless dedication to our cause, and the courage and grace they showed in the rough and tumble of a presidential campaign. We can all look forward with great interest to her future service to Alaska, the Republican Party and our country.

To all my campaign comrades, from Rick Davis and Steve Schmidt and Mark Salter, to every last volunteer who fought so hard and valiantly, month after month, in what at times seemed to be the most challenged campaign in modern times, thank you so much. A lost election will never mean more to me than the privilege of your faith and friendship. I don't know — I don't know what more we could have done to try to win this election. I'll leave that to others to determine. Every candidate makes mistakes, and I'm sure I made my share of them. But I won't spend a moment of the future regretting what might have been. This campaign was and will remain the great honor of my life, and my heart is filled with nothing but gratitude for the experience and to the American people for giving me a fair hearing before deciding that Sen. Obama and my old friend Sen. Joe Biden should have the honor of leading us for the next four years.


Please. Please. I would not — I would not be an American worthy of the name should I regret a fate that has allowed me the extraordinary privilege of serving this country for a half a century. Today, I was a candidate for the highest office in the country I love so much. And tonight, I remain her servant. That is blessing enough for anyone, and I thank the people of Arizona for it.


MCCAIN: Tonight — tonight, more than any night, I hold in my heart nothing but love for this country and for all its citizens, whether they supported me or Sen. Obama — whether they supported me or Sen. Obama.

I wish Godspeed to the man who was my former opponent and will be my president.

And I call on all Americans, as I have often in this campaign, to not despair of our present difficulties, but to believe, always, in the promise and greatness of America, because nothing is inevitable here.

Americans never quit.

We never surrender.

We never hide from history.

We make history.
Blessed be...

Tuesday, November 4, 2008


Talk about Courage!!!

Subject: Ed "Too Tall to Fly" Freeman

A measure of heroism that is not so obvious in the Mel Gibson movie:"We Were Soldiers Once......And Young

You're an 18 or 19 year old kid. You're critically wounded, and dying in the jungle in the Ia Drang Valley, November 14,1965. LZ Xray, Vietnam. Your Infantry Unit is outnumbered 8 to 1, and the enemy fire is so intense, from 100 or 200 yards away, that your own Infantry Commander has ordered the medevac helicopters to stop coming in.You're lying there, listening to the enemy machine guns, and you know you're not getting out. Your family is 1/2 way around the world, 12,000 miles away, and you'll never see them again. As the world starts to fade in and out, you know this is the day. Then, over the machine gun noise, you faintly hear that sound of a helicopter, and you look up to see a Huey, but it doesn't seem real, because no medevac markings are on it. Ed "Too Tall" Freeman is coming for you. He's not a medevac, so it's not his job, but he's flying his Huey down into the machine gun fire, after the medevac's were ordered not to come. He's coming anyway. And he drops it in, and sits there in the machine gun fire, they load 2 or 3 of you onboard, as they drop off much needed water and ammunition. Then he flies you up and out through the gunfire, to the Doctors and Nurses. And, he kept coming back......13 more times..... and took about 30 of you and your buddies out, who would never have gotten out.

Medal of Honor Recipient Ed Freeman died Wednesday Sept. 3, 2008 at the age of 80, in Boise, Idaho.Thanks Ed....... Blue Skies forever.
I was a war protester back in the day, but I married a Vietnam Vet. The war took a toll on him & does to this day I believe. We have been divorced 29 yrs. We had a wonderful son together, but even the father/son relationship has suffered. I was so moved by this story. A man who saw his duty not, I believe, because he was "supposed" to do this-he was not, he was not ordered to do this. But instead he was heroic because that quite simply was who he was as a person. I hope we all become a little more heroic today.
Blessed be...

Election Day

Today, finally, I got to vote. There was a line at my voting place at 7:20am when I arrived & I was out the door by 7:50am. So not too bad. Made it to work on time. In OK, however, you are allowed 2 hours during the work day to vote if need be.
Now the waiting begins anew. No matter who you support I hope you exercised your Constitutional right to vote for the candidate of your choice. It is so important that we exercise this Freedom.
Blessed be...

Monday, November 3, 2008

County Cork Ireland

My people come from County Cork, at least my Irish ancestors. Finding that it is on the coast makes me understand my (& my bother's) love of the sea. The smell of the sea is in our blood-it come to this Country with our ancestors. The beauty of the windswept coastline. It is what touched me about the the Oregon/Washington coast, and why that part of the Country calls me back more each day.
It is from both my Irish & Native American heritages that I get my "second sight", my love of the land, my affinity for Nature, my superstitions. I always, in my youth, had very much the look of the Irish upon me -blue eyes, freckles, reddish hair. But as I matured more & more my Native side surfaces. Most everyone I meet comments that I must be Native. I like the idea that who I am shows so on the outside. After all, who says you can't be a blue-eyed Indian.

An Irish Prayer

May God give you...
For every storm, a rainbow,
For every tear, a smile,
For every care, a promise,
And a blessing in each trial.
For every problem life sends,
A faithful friend to share,
For every sigh, a sweet song,
And an answer for each prayer.

Blessed be...

Thursday, October 30, 2008

My favorite poet

Touched by an Angel

We, unaccustomed to courage
exiles from delight
live coiled in shells of loneliness
until love leaves its high holy temple
and comes into our sight to liberate us into life.
Love arrives and in its train come ecstasies
old memories of pleasure
ancient histories of pain.
Yet if we are bold, love strikes away the chains of fear from our souls.
We are weaned from our timidity
In the flush of love's light we dare be brave
And suddenly we see that love costs all we are and will ever be.
Yet it is only love which sets us free.

Maya Angelou

Blessed be...

Monday, October 20, 2008



The above is Sanskrit & means "A Beautiful Mistake". There are no mistakes in life, just opportunites for growth, learning, & humility. If we see each so called mis-step as an opportunity then life & the living of it will take on a whole new perspective. Sometimes we spend alot of time on "if only, "what if", "coulda, shoulda, whoulda", etc. Each twist & turn of life is an experience we have chosen-some more conscious than others, but still chosen. We, I believe, choose our time to leave our Spirit Home & have a human experience here, we choose the experiences we will have here as a way to grow & become more enlightened on our journey of self-awareness. We also leave this life when our work is done. Do we choose our time to die? I'm not sure, but I do know we do not stay here one moment past the time all of our work is done. That is the cycle of Life, Death, Re-birth. From Spiritual being, to having a Human experience, to completion of our Work, to our return Home once again in Spirit form. I know in my heart that we are ever-living beings full of energy (call it Soul) who have lived & will continue to live forever. As I have said before-Death is not the end, but another new beginning. We go Home to share our experiences & the lessons learned.

Beautiful mistakes--oh my!! I have had my share. Some were so much more beautiful than the others, but from them all I have become the woman I am today. I have shed my skin several times in rebirths & reinventions of myself until I have become the woman I believe I was meant to be-a woman I really like. I am much more loving, tolerant, understanding, compassionate, & informed than I was when I left Smalltown, OK so very many years ago. I have lived so many lives in those years-traveled so many miles. It has been an amazing journey...& it it continues.

I was once so narrow minded, so closed off. Now I embrace the differences in everyone. I see people through their hearts not their skin or orientation or political views. I think I see the real person now. I accept, embrace, & love the differences I find in others. Through those differences I find out things about myself & it challenges my belief system. Sometimes it even helps me to change a belief or fine tune a thought. I love those challenges. I found many such experiences in the bigger cities in which I have lived, but I am finding them here also. I am also finding opportunities to voice what I have learned, what I have come to believe. Maybe, just maybe my voice will help someone else to grow, to think, to learn, to question & to find his/her own true voice. Inside each of our belief systems is the "gray area" that area that we thought was so black & white--that is until we take a situation & put ourself there as a participant not an onlooker. Then the perspective starts to change. Then we see the other person's view. Then we grow. Then we become more compassionate, more tolerant, less judgemental.

Reflect on your own Beautiful Mistakes. Challenge yourself today!

Blessed be...

Friday, October 17, 2008

To Thine Ownself Be True...

As I was getting logged on this morning "To Thine Ownself Be True" was one of the first things I saw. Now I do not believe in coincidence-everything happens for a reason. A lesson to be learned, a lesson to be taught. There is meaning in everything. At least as far as I am concerned. That is my belief.

In thinking about this phrase for the last hour or so I realized it goes along with everything else that has been running through my mind this week-the boyfriend issue, etc. Also, I found out (20 yrs later) that my Nanny, whom I adored, actually wrote me out of her will. DUH!! All these years I had been told she left everything to my Mom (her daughter-in-law) because my Dad had already died (he was an only child & my brother & myself were the only heirs) & wanted my Mom to get everything. Not true. She completely wrote me out (I found the will when I was going through stuff for the yard sale). Everything would have gone to my son, my brother, & his son if Mom has already died. My brother would have been the trustee for the boys. Supposedly this was all because no one liked my husband at the time. Whatever! To make a long story short, the money was all eventually spent on my brother & his son. My son has never gotten anything from my family. It is so sad & makes him feel like crap where his Grandmother is concerned (I will NOT be sharing this latest discovery with him). So, as always I have been lied to once more. But, it has been a lot of years since Nanny died, on my birthday, so I will go on & not dwell on this latest crap. Peace out on this subject!

To Thine Ownself Be True...immortal words. Words by which, in all actuality, I have always lived. Guess it is kinda my creed. I have heard my own music & danced to it. I have really never cared what others thought, but have lived my life doing what I felt was "right". Right for me, right for my son, right at any given time in my life. I have traveled, lived in many cities far from Smalltown, OK. I have been to town, seen the elephant, & have the t-shirt. Boy do I have the t-shirts!! Life has always been one big adventure for me. Pack up, hit the road, see where the path lead. It has lead many places-some good, some bad, but always a learning experience. Always a path of growth & discovery about me-who I am, what I want. I have found out I can do just about anything I set my mind to doing, I have grown into a loving, compassionate, hard-working, tolerant, understanding, passion filled woman with a terrific sense of humor & the ability to see the positive in Life. Far far from the girl I was when I started the Journey. I have found my belief system about the Universe & the After Life. I have faced my demons, I have celebrated my loves, but most of all I have lived. After all isn't that what Life is meant to be--Living & Discovering.

People have commented on my phrase "Blessed be" so I thought I would close with its meaning.

This is a wiccan salutation meant to empower both parties with blessed be powers. The Blessed Be salutation is a process of transferring positive energy to both parties. To say "Blessed be" to someone indicates that you wish good and positive things upon them.
Pronunciation: Bless-ed be

So to all of you today & always

Blessed be...

Monday, October 13, 2008


Monday, Monday -can't trust that day...

Rainy Days & Mondays always make me...

But today Monday means I am a winner!! Over at Mama Bear's Den (you can access her blog through my favorites) was a give-away drawing for some really cute fall items plus CHOCOLATE (every woman's favorite). Well, low & behold I won. Go figure. Thanks!! Dawn--your blog is always so much fun. Visit Dawn sometime. She is a homeschooling Mom of two beautiful young people who just moved to one of my favorite places on earth--Oregon!!

It is snowing in Montana-3 feet in the mountains so far-- guess I am glad to still be in OK. The trees are just starting to turn in my part of OK. Should be really lovely in a week or so. Rain predicted for tonight through Tuesday. It is Fall after all.

Visited with Mom & Pops Saturday. They have so much stuff after combining their households that some of it just has to go. So...Mom volunteered me to run their yard sale next weekend. Living an hour away makes it quite an adventure. But we are organized, they have their instructions for the week, & I will be there next weekend to get that stuff moved outta there. Money, money, money!! LOL!
New job is going good. In this economy, I just feel so very blessed to have a good paying job. It will allow me to get caught up from the weeks I was out of work &, hopefully, start getting a little put aside. We shall see.
Thinking alot this weekend about changing my life some more. I no longer correspond or talk to Big Guy. That just finally ran its course. Had a real awakening one night when we were talking that the conversations weren't adding anything positive to my life. In fact, they were just adding to the stress. So, I told him we need a break. But, for me, the break will be permanent.
Sparky & I still see each other & talk daily. But, that relationship is not adding any value to my life either--not emotionally or romantically at least. I still have some trouble totally trusting hime after our "weird" breakup of several years ago. So, I will continue to evaluate the situation, but I know in my heart it is coming to an end. He is a good man & has been such a big help to me over the last couple of years, but you cannot stay in something that doesn't make you happy & that is going nowhere just out of a sense of obligation. Didn't stay in my marriages for that reason so sure cannot stay in a "dating" thing that will never be anything else for that reason. Much to ponder, much to decide. I'm in a rut & must get out. Send me good vibes!!
So this week I will be figuring out my options!
Blessed be....

Friday, October 3, 2008


If I should stay I would only be in your way

So I'll go, and yet I know I'll think of you each step of the way

And I will always love you

I will always love you

Bittersweet memories That's all I have, and I'm taking with me

Goodbye, please don't you cry

Cause we both know, I'm not what you need

But, I will always love you I will always love you I hope life

Treats you kind

And I hope you have all you dream of

I wish you joy And happiness

But above all this, I wish you love

And I will always love you I will always love you

Yes, I will always love you

I will always love you
This song was playing in my head all night. So I thought why?? Every now & then a ghost will wander through my heart--a ghost of a love gone bad, a lover left (for valid reasons), a memory of all the good times that could not overshadow the bad. Still, ex #2 was, is, will always be the one I loved beyond all reason-an addiction I could not get past. The one who will always hold my heart-even though he stomped it good. Still, love knows no reason-it is what it is when you give your heart away. Just because we brought out the worst in each other does not mean there was no love. At times, the love was all that kept us together. But, a love like that can kill you when it goes over an edge. This one crossed that point & I knew I had to leave. It was hard to do. I have no regrets about leaving, but I sure do miss the good times. So...Cowboy I do love you, just like I promised that will never change. But I had to save myself because I could not save you. I hope you have conquered your demons & found peace, contentment, & again love.
Blessed be...

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

On & on...

The Road Goes Ever On
The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can,
Pursuing it with eager feet,
Until it joins some larger way
Where many paths and errands meet.
And whither then? I cannot say.
-- J R R Tolkien
Wander lust is in my heart, my very soul longs for the open road, a new adventure. I am more cautious these days, no running with no plan, no destination. I plan my roaming more these days-so stifling. I long for the day when I can again load up & hit the road. No destination, no plan-just me, the furkids, & the open road. Back roads offer such discovery, so many things to see & explore. Old towns, old houses, old barns. Sometimes people that time has almost forgotten. Motels with really crappy TV & no internet. Back to a slower pace, a more peaceful time. Time to take a deep breath & really, finally, exhale. Feel all the stress just leave in one long exhaled breath.
I had not realized how much of myself I had lost in the last year & a half with my former job. I became someone I almost did not know. I was hard & tough at work. No time for BS, just get the job done. In truth, I am more laid back than that. Just kinda easy, breezy taking Life as it comes. So my karma was a bit out of whack. I realized it when I was out of work & had time to reflect on many things. Now it is all coming together in a very peaceful, contented way. I am working my way back from an abyss. Now I realize that I must focus on myself & get back to the spiritual, peaceful existance I love. So, I am getting ready to start yoga again, maybe even Pilates (I have recorded several sessions on Veria-great channel on Dish Network). I am starting to read again. Different things-magazines-I really like Science of the Mind-novels-ordered some Ann Rule the other day-watching a lot of Paranormal State on A&E, getting ready to start reading Sylvia Browne again also. Finished "The Last Lecture" by Randy Pausch-a MUST read for everyone. The lecture can be found online at YouTube as well as other sites. Well worth the time.
Massage (I have been twice in the last couple of weeks) is getting all the built up stress & knots out of my muscles. The therapist is wonderful-not a good as the one I saw before, but definately has a good touch. I think I will go for reflexology for the next time & see what that unleashes.
So for now, I will wander within my own spirit. Wander to that place where all is peaceful, mellow, & laid back. Deep in meditation to find my centered balanced self once more.
Blessed be...

Tuesday, September 9, 2008


Moments...they come upon me unawares. From nowhere, in the middle of the workday I get a flash of past days. Lazy, lovely, happy days. Days spent in the sunshine, walking fields of green, birds overhead, cattle lying in the shade or belly deep in the pond on a hot Oklahoma summer day. Time alone on a dairy farm full of Jersey cows. Accompanied on my wanderings by a border collie. Lazy, hazy days of childhood. Days when adulthood seemed an eternity away. Now it seems but a moment from a carefree childhood summer to busy days at a computer.

I have wandered my whole life. First just pastures, woods, fields, country roads. Then highways, cities, mountains, deserts--far from that Oklahoma farm. I rode horses in my childhood, Harleys in my wanderings. But no matter how far I traveled, no matter who I was on any given day--the Oklahoma Farm Girl was never far away. Hidden in my heart just waiting to reappear.